Breaking Mothafuckin News

*trying to compose myself, cause its not funny, but then again just imagining what Really happened in the Wal-Mart(is the devil) parking lot with the misses and the little lady that just about totaled her big boy Caddy, is getting the best of me. So I receive a call about lets say about three hours ago of who I thought was the misses, and was, but the pissed off version. Man, when I tell you this is not one chick you want to piss off, believe that shit. You know how those Louisianans are with that voodoo and shit, I don't fucks with em, lol. So, I pick up the phone and all I hear is her yelling "the bitch fucking hit it, the bitch fucking hit it", over and over again. I was like who the fuck are you talking about and who hit what. Still, "the bitch fucking hit it, the bitch fucking hit it". By this time I was ready to hang up thinking that she was having a bad trip off the weed or something until she came out with the slurred version of what really happened. "The bitch fucking hit my truck, I'm in so much pain right now", and immediately fear just shot through my spine. I was thinking, because of the way she was talking, that she was hurt or possibly severely injured, but umm no. Thing is, from what I was told she was shopping in Wal-Mart only to come out to half of her truck just smashed. I honestly don't know how this is possible, I mean its not like she drives one of those Barbie doll cars, so whoever it was must have had like one of those ol school military hummers that can drive through buildings and shit. I've got the feeling she's gonna do something crazy tonight in retaliation, and I of course will be the one bailing her punk ass out. Lets rewind back to the good ol days(about a week ago) when life was good and the misses watched "I Love The Fishes" for the first time, enjoy.