So.... last night we decided to go to a bar, we don't have clubs here in Laramie, just bars, and a shit-ton of them. Everythang was everythang, just me and the girls hanging getting drunk off of countless shots of Patron', and out of no where this thing (I'm not even gonna say man) approached me with the craziest pick-up line I've ever heard. I have to say brother was banging, but I have something even better at home. So anyways homie came up to me, and this is exactly how the convo went.
Homie- You remind me of my mom.
Me- Umm excuse me
Homie-You remind me of my mom.
Me- Is that right, How so?
Homie- Cause baby you're beauty has been whooping my ass all night long.
Me- *Staring* Are you serious?
Homie- Yeah baby, when you goin let me hit that?
Me- *leaned over to the girlfriend* Did this mothafucka say that I've been beating his ass with my looks?
S.M.- Yeah, I'm still stuck on the whole moms thing.
So... by this time, S.M. and I are dying laughing, Mr. Wright walks up to buy me a drank (we were on some, "lets play strangers at the bar, and then go home and have wild kinky sex on the lawn then move it to the pool table for the finale", type shit), I gladly accept. Seeing all this go down, homie decides to get all emotional and starts to talk shit. He really just made matters worst for himself, by this time tears were running down my face, but I was finally calm enough to address the situation.
Me- First of all I'm not completely sure that I'm comfortable with you saying that you want to hit anything, seeing that you obviously have some kind of freaky thoughts of incest shit that you need to discuss with your mom. Second, I'm not that drunk, hell to be honest with you, ya quickly sobered me up. And third, now this is the most important one so listen carefully, get what we in the land of no bullshit like to call, THE FUCK OUT OF MY FACE!!!
UGGHH!!!!! I have no tolerance for ignant mofo's especially men, stay in school damnit, just stay in school!!!
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