Okay fam please excuse the possible typos in this post...I'm drunk as hell right now, but this you already knew...
This is the song I was listening to before I started this post(Click on the play button dammit)
So where do I begin...How about this morning...Well this afternoon...Is when I woke my ass up out of the drunken slumber that I was in...1:38 this afternoon to be exact... I was looking at the clock like "Is this a joke, it can't possibly be this damn late"...Usually I'm at work by this time...But ummm, no...There was a little mishap or something this morning... I checked my phone and there was like 50 missed calls/text messages...Get to work a couple hours later...Lied and said I had a appointment...Bounced that bytch a 1/2 hour later...I had another "appointment" to go to...I really didn't feel like working today...Went home and passed out once again...
What time I was pounced upon by Boston and F, I don't know...But it was dark, and raining outside...You know I didn't even notice that she wasn't home this afternoon...A bad mother I know...F took her out for the day...Apparently they had a good time... She looked and smelled like a brand new puppy...Oh and also, the plans I had for the 4th which included me sleeping from Friday until Monday morning have now been changed...So says F...
"You know babe, I was thinking we should REALLY do something at least on Friday"
"Yeah, did you have anything in mind"
"I was thinking we should go fishing"
"Wait a minute...WHAT?!?!?!"
"You know FISHING, it'll be great, and Boston would love it"
"Have you lost your damn mind??? I don't even feed the fish that we have and you want me to go sit at some hot ass pond and feed/try to catch more"
"Pretty much, its very relaxing. You're gonna love it. I promise to make it worth your time"
"Oh no sir, not even dick can convince me to do some lame shit like that."
"Come on honey"
"Nope, and isn't the lake closed on Friday. Shit everythang else is. If I were the fish I'd be like damn ya'll I'm off today"
"It isn't closed. We can go for a couple hours, leave, go home fire up the grill and light up the fireworks I bought for you. You're always talking about blowing some shyt up, heres your chance"
"Sold to the sexy ass whyte boy in the tight man bobbie highlighting Polo"
So yes fam, I'm going fishing on Friday...I am not looking forward to it...The hell I look like...I WILL be out there with the boojieness expanded to the tenth power...Fuck a damn fish...I'm too sexy for that shyt...But I love his ass, and he promised to let me blow something up...So y'all pray for me in my attempt to defy the laws of nature by fishing in heels and a halter top...Fuck this shyt...I'LL HOLLA!!!
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5 comments:
Looks like you'll be sleeping by the lake..., LOL! And while y'all out there, can y'all catch me some Talapia? I would like them filleted also if you don't mind...., hee hee! Email me the full report afterwards, for I gotsta here this one..., Have a wonderful day!
(Laughing uncontrollably) Ooh, ooh, it hurts so bad!!! HAHAHAHA!!! I can just see yo conceited ass out there raght nah like, can we just leave, like yesterday. Lmao. I was wondering why you wouldn't give me a straight answer on the plans. (Calls the click to enlighten them of the pain that hurts in a good way)
@S.M. -Ooh Ooh I got one, yo momma so old her social security number is one...Ha!!! Take that... When is your pretend Banker azz goin get a blog...If my always drunk but sober azz can get one without the fire marshal shutting me down, then so can you...Matter of fact we can be like co-authors and what not...
Once I find a way to ban folks from my shyt...You azz is grazz..."Betsy Ross and the flag"...I do not like you right now...
"Put the pie in the va-jai"
Yeah niggaret you can ban muy azz, but I knows where you stay. I'm bored, which is the only reason I'm viewing this shit. I had like the worst date eva, Imma tell ya about that later. Chris is on some other shit, holla at her. See ya in da morning.
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